Posts Tagged ‘goals’

How To Get Married To The Other Side Of The Table

Friday, August 27th, 2010
Image Credit You'll Never Move From Dating To Marriage If You Don't Ask…

You'll Never Move From Dating To Marriage If You Don't Ask…

Every time we negotiate, we are entering into a new relationship. The one thing that we need to do before we start each negotiation is to figure out just exactly what type of relationship we want to enter into this time. Although this sounds like it’s an easy question, it turns out that finding the right answer can be a bit harder than it initially seems…

Are We Dating Or Getting Engaged?

The first question that we need to ask ourselves is if we are looking at entering a short-term relationship with the other side of the table or a longer term relationship. It turns out that this is the most critical question that you need to get an answer to.

You might be tempted to assume that every negotiation is the start of a long term partnership of some sort. The reality is that these types of relationships are actually quite rare – most of the parties that we negotiate with end up being either one-night stands or short lived dating partners.

The Ripple Effect

It can be easy for a sales negotiator to view the current negotiation as being his or her entire universe. This is a mistake. We need to understand that in this life everything that we do is connected to everything else.

That means that this negotiation will affect future negotiations in some manner. What we need to do before we start any negotiation is to figure out just exactly what that impact will be and make sure that we can live with the consequences.

The Past Always Counts

No sales negotiation is an island. This means that what has happened in the past will have an impact on what we do in the present and in the future.

Before starting a negotiation it is important that we take a step back and review what we’ve learned from past negotiations. This will provide us with good guidance on what we can reasonably expect to get out of the current negotiation.

Second Marriages (And Third and Fourth)

If you are considering entering into a long-term relationship with the other side of the table, you need to consider your past. How many such relationships have you been in previously?

The goal here is to learn from your past long-term relationships. What are the positive benefits that you’ve gotten out of those relationships? How can you get the same benefits out of this new relationships and how can you make them even better?

What Went Wrong Last Time?

Not all relationships that you negotiate turn out the way that you were expecting them to. The long-term ones are no exception to this rule.

Just because you had some relationship failures in the past doesn’t mean that you can’t make this one a success. The key is to look back at the ones that didn’t work out and try to understand what went wrong. Is there anything that you would have done differently during the negotiations that might have made it a success?

What All Of This Means For You

Although it doesn’t happen all that often, some relationships with the other side of the table do turn into long-term relationships. You can make the most of these opportunities if you plan for them before sitting down to start your next sales negotiation.

Making sure that a long-term relationship is what you want is a good place to start. Looking back at past long-term relationships to gleam what went well and what went wrong can also help to guide the current negotiations.

Having the ability to negotiate a long-term relationship is a key skill that every sales negotiator should have. However, knowing when to (and when not to) negotiate such a relationship is what will set you apart from all of the other sales negotiators out there…

- Dr. Jim Anderson
Blue Elephant Consulting –
Your Source For Real World Negotiating Skills™

Question For You: Do you think that long-term relationships should be negotiated any differently than short term ones?

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What We’ll Be Talking About Next Time

What is the #1 thing that you need to do before you sit down at your next sales negotiation? Polish your shoes? No. Work on your icy “that deal’s not good enough for me so don’t even offer it” stare? No. How about something much simpler that all too often gets forgotten by even the best sales negotiators: picking your target.

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3 Rules Of Negotiating Power That You Need To Know

Tuesday, December 8th, 2009
Image Credit The 3 Rules Of Power In Negotiations Require You To Be Cautious

The 3 Rules Of Power In Negotiations Require You To Be Cautious

Let your mind drift back to the last sales negotiation that you were involved in. When talk finally got around to negotiating a deal, after all of the PowerPoint slide shows, all of the RFP responses, maybe even the product bake-offs, who had the upper hand – you or the other side of the table?

Why Power Matters

The upper hand in any negotiation is held by the side that has the most power. In sales negotiations, power is a slippery thing. It’s hard to tell how much of it you have and likewise, it’s hard to tell how much of it the other side of the table has. Despite all of this, it’s a critical part of the process – “he who has the most power in a negotiation will probably end up being MORE satisfied by the outcome.”

What all of this means is that you’ve got to get better at evaluating the situation: you’ve got to know how to find out how much power you have and how much the other side has.

Power Management: How It’s Done

Sales people have known for a long time that negotiation is a process of information discovery. During this discovery process you learn what your sources of power for this particular negotiation are. That being said, there are three negotiating rules that will help you to learn more about your power during a negotiation:

  • Rule #1 – You Have More Power: The #1 rule of power management in a sales negotiation is for you to realize that you ALWAYS have more power on your side than you think that you do. Even if you think that you don’t have ANY power at the start of a negotiation, then you’re wrong – otherwise why would the other side be negotiating with you?
  • Rule #2 – Power Is Not Real: You need to understand that power is not real. It only exists in your mind and so it is what you think it is. If you think that you are powerful, then you are. If you don’t think that you are powerful, then you won’t be. Of course this means that you always need to picture yourself as being powerful no matter what the circumstances are. Easy for me to say, hard for you to do.
  • Rule #3 – Power Flows: The level of power that we start a sales negotiation with is not constant throughout the negotiations. The other side may make verbal blunders and reveal too much, they may make too many concessions, or do other things that will increase our power during the negotiation. Likewise, if we aren’t careful we can give away our power during the negotiation.

What This Means For You

These three rules of negotiating power are your ticket to success. At the end of the day, every time that we enter into a negotiation we’re hoping that we come out of it feeling satisfied with what we were able to accomplish – we didn’t give away too much and we got what we needed.

In order to get this type of satisfaction we need to have enough power on our side to enable us to get our way on those things that count.

Realizing that negotiating power is a state of mind and that we have control over how much of it we have will allow us to use it to close better deals and close them quicker.

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What We’ll Be Talking About Next Time

When you hold up a mirror and look into it, what do you see? Do you see a good negotiator? How could you tell if you were looking at one? This is one of those timeless questions that we are always asking ourselves: am I a good negotiator? Well good news, I’ve got the 5 questions that you need to answer in order to resolve this issue once and for all!

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Negotiation Do’s & Don’ts From The Master Negotiators

Thursday, December 4th, 2008
Master Negotiators Use Many Different Skills To Achieve Their Goals

Master Negotiators Use Many Different Skills To Achieve Their Goals

If only there was some book, some DVD to watch, or some class that you could take that would provide you with access to all of the secrets of those master negotiators whom we are always reading about. You know the ones, they negotiate the billion dollar business deal, the hostage negotiations, they settle the labor strikes, and they come up with solutions to lawsuits before they hit the courts. Just what are their secrets?

As we’ve discussed before, there are no such courses, DVDs, or courses to take because of the nature of negotiating: it’s not just a couple of key ideas, but rather a whole bunch of very small things that when taken together make a master negotiator.

However, there is no need to despair! The good folks over at Karrass have been doing research into what makes a good negotiator for quite some time. Based on this they have been able to pull together a list of ten things that a master negotiator needs to be able to do.

What I’m hoping that you’ll get from this list is the awareness that there is nothing earth shattering here. No great secrets are revealed. No hidden negotiating ninja secrets are being brought to the surface for the first time. Rather, a set of skills are being identified as being those skills that a master negotiator needs to have.

It’s not that a master negotiator has just one of these skills that makes them so skillful. Rather it’s the fact that they have ALL of these skills that makes them a master negotiator. Now there’s something to think about! Here’s the list, let’s see how many of these negotiating skills you already have:

  1. Nothing Is Fixed: Don’t let the other side of the table try to intimidate you with “last & final” offers, firm fixed prices, or even “take it or leave it” statements. Remember -  this is a negotiation and that means that everything is negotiable.
  2. Deeper Is Better For Both Sides: Although you are negotiating directly with the person(s) on the other side of the table, you are really negotiating with their entire organization. This means that before your negotiating partner can agree to your terms, they are going to have to get buy-in from their organization. During your negotiations you need to cover all of the key details in enough depth that the other side will be able to thoroughly explain the deal internally.
  3. Got To Get Satisfaction: Forget win-lose, win-win, etc. Negotiating is all about making sure that both sides come away feeling satisfied with the outcome. Although it’s easy to focus on the stated negotiation issues, be sure to look for other “hidden” issues that are also important to the other side. Addressing these issues will boost satisfaction and increase the probability of reaching agreement.
  4. These Boots Are Made For Walking: One of the most powerful negotiating techniques is also one of the most difficult to do – leave & walk out. This by itself would kill a negotiation, so you also have to master the other half of this skill – you need to know when to return later.
  5. Conflict Is King: The very reason that you are negotiating is because there are differences between both sides. Differences mean that there will be conflict. You need to be able to deal with conflict. If you have an overpowering need to be liked, then you will end up giving too much away during the negotiation just to be reassured that the other side likes you in the end.
  6. Too Much: In any negotiation, you can screw up. You can end up asking the other side for more than they are willing / able to give. When you realize that you’ve done this is the time for you to take a step back and tell the other side that you are willing to renegotiate. No matter what, make sure that you show empathy for the other side’s situation.
  7. No Such Thing As Too Much Education: You will never know everything that there is to know about negotiation. There are so many small tricks & techniques that it will take you a lifetime to master even some of them. This means that you always need to be reading and studying in order to boost your knowledge of negotiating strategy & tactics.
  8. Aim High: Where you end up in a negotiation has a great deal to do with where you set your target. If you aim high, then you will be prepared to take the negotiating risks that go with higher goals. Lofty goals don’t come easily so you are going to have to be willing to work hard and to take your time.
  9. Be Testy: Since you can never completely know what the other side of the table is thinking, you need to always be testing him / her. You just might surprise yourself when the other side gives in to one of your demands. Once again, this type of testing requires that you take your time and be very, very patient.
  10. Take Your Team To School: Negotiating is often a team sport and you want your team to be in the best shape possible. You need to make sure that your team has been trained to negotiate the way that you want them to. This is the one area that investing in quality training (just like the training offered by Blue Elephant Consulting) can really pay dividends.

How many of these tips do you already use in your negotiations? Which ones were new to you? How do you keep improving your negotiating skills? Leave me a comment and let me know what you are thinking.

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Posted in negotiation skills | 3 Comments »

The Power Of Planning Your Next Negotiation

Tuesday, December 2nd, 2008
Planning Before You Start To Negotiate Determines How It All Turns Out

Planning Before You Start To Negotiate Determines How It All Turns Out

Your parents, teachers, best friends, financial planners, parole officers, etc. were all right when they told you that in order to be successful in life you really need to plan, plan, plan. In the world of business, planning is a part of almost all activities; however, it’s in the area of negotiations that business planning will provide you with the greatest return on your investment of time.

With all of this being said, you would think that planning would be second nature to anyone who is getting ready to enter into negotiations. You would be wrong.

It’s not so much that folks forget to research the other side of the table (Google has made that easy to almost instantaneously), but rather that we don’t spend enough time understanding what WE are trying to get out of the negotiating.

The following steps will help you to put together a great plan for your next negotiating session:

Pick A Good Negotiator

Maybe the negotiator is you, but if it isn’t, then make sure that you pick someone who know how to negotiate. Included in this person’s set of skills should be a strong ability to work with teams and the ability to control their emotions.

Plug In To Your Power Sources

The key to having a successful negotiation is to make sure that you are negotiating from a source of power – hopefully a more powerful position than the other side of the table. This means that you need to take the time to identify your sources of power.

Remember that we always have MORE power than we initially think that we do. Additionally, study the other side’s sources of power also. They almost always have LESS power than we initially think that they do.

One Night Stands vs. Long Term Relationships

Are you preparing to negotiate with someone that you will end up having a long-term relationship with? If so, then this means that you have not only short-term goals, but also long-term goals that need to be considered.

Why Are They Willing To Negotiate?

Making sure that you truly understand why the other side of the table is there in the first place can be key to creating a solution that works for all. If you can uncover what their motivation is, then you have solved half of the problem of creating a solution that will work for both of you.

Goals Are Good

Knowing what motivates you is just as important as understanding the other side’s motivation. You need to further understand what it’s going to take in order for you to leave the negotiations feeling satisfied. This means that you need to have very clear goals so that you’ll know when you have reached them.

Become A Time Lord

One hidden aspect of any negotiation is that everything changes. The things that we are negotiating for have had a value in the past, they have a different value today, and they’ll have yet another value sometime off in the future. We need to be able to realize this and consider all three values when we are negotiating for something.

There you have it – the basic building blocks that need to go into the planning that you do for your next negotiating session. With these taken care of, you’re almost guaranteed to be successful!

What type of planning do you do today before you start a negotiation? Do you always have a chance to do this preparation or do you find yourself being thrown into negotiation sessions unprepared? Which of these planning steps do you feel are the most important to you? Leave me a comment and let me know what you are thinking.

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